Hearing God's Voice in a Monthly Pastors' Meeting
What God is pressing on my soul in pastoral trials
It was a sweet encouragement to connect and resource likeminded pastors in Los Angeles for healthier churches through our Shepherd LA co-op lunch today. We gave each pastor a copy of The Sing! Hymnal and used it to sing “Jesus Strong and Kind” together (praise God for the generosity of Bellflower Baptist Church). We discussed particular burdens and pressures different pastors among us were feeling, pastoring a marriage that is possibly emotionally abusive, and how we were processing and pastoring the church in light of Charlie Kirk’s assassination last Wednesday. We read Scripture and prayed. The slowing down together as pastors who are merely needy and desperate men dependent on the grace of Jesus is a special time in my life each month.
I wanted to share some personal takeaways I’ve had from the lunch today. I read Psalm 95 and one verse says, “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts.” Another pastor read John 10 that Christ’s sheep know his voice. He then prayed that we pastors would hear, know, and receive the voice of God in our lives.
During the meeting, here are some ways I heard God speaking to me.
“Open your heart.” God reminded me to keep opening my heart to the members I serve. Pastoral ministry is painful and it is part of the work and calling. I’ve felt the pressure to close my heart to others and not share it with them. A pastor-brother read this passage that resonated deeply for me: “We have spoken openly to you, Corinthians; our heart has been opened wide. We are not withholding our affection from you, but you are withholding yours from us. I speak as to my children; as a proper response, open your heart to us” (2 Corinthians 6:11–13 ). These words anchor my soul as it is not only a potential or actual pain, but a privilge and honor to keep my heart and affection open for my people. During the conversation a few comments combined essentially said, “As a pastor for many years you can start to see these things coming because you’ve seen them before. Yet you are to open your heart, even if you know it’s going to go in a hurtful direction. It’s a good hurt.” Amen and amen. And in many cases like the ones I’ve experienced, the hurt is not only on my side but the ones I love on the other side feel a hurt as well.
“Boast.” Another pastor-brother read, “And not only that, but we also boast in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us” (Romans 5:3–5). The word that hit hard was the word, “boast.” Not merely endure affliction or tolerate affliction or get through affliction or don’t complain in affliction, but boast in your afflictions. God intends to meet us with his mercy as we boast in the afflictions of life on the path of following Jesus. Praise God that these afflictions are not meaningless but endurance-building, character-forming, and hope-filling. I want endurance, godly character, and hope in the resurrection of the dead and the life of the coming age. I praise God and want to boast in the afflictions that produce these things.
“Perfect.” Another pastor-brother said, “God has the perfect obstacle course for our growth as men and as pastors.” The word “perfect” struck me. God is so good to all of his people in every single one of their trials. Me included. I am in the perfect obstacle course with the exact trials I need for the work God means to do in my heart and soul. We can trust the Lord with these trials. What other choice do we have? What other option would I want? Christ is better than all and he draws us toward him in heart-wrenching, perfect, and glorious ways that we cannot understand now but will when we’re further along.
Grace and ✌🏾
P. J. Tibayan
Bellflower Baptist Church, Bellflower, CA
