TRAUMA/TRIGGER WARNING: PICTURES OF MY SON’S MISCARRIED AND PREBORN BODY IS POSTED BELOW SO DON’T SCROLL DOWN UNLESS YOU’RE WILLING TO SEE THEM. We do not consider it crass but want to share with others part of his human dignity as seen in the physical body God gave him before he passed away.
Today my son was supposed to be born. Instead, in God’s providence, he was miscarried on December 25, 2022 at 12 weeks in the womb. He was and is named Rise Immanuel Tibayan. Say his name out loud with me, “Rise Immanuel Tibayan.” Thank you for saying his name out loud.
We named him Rise because I believe he will one day rise to the resurrection of life with all of the saints who are in Christ Jesus. We named him Immanuel because Isaiah 7 was read in that Sunday morning’s gathering for Christmas. This truth is wonderful and life giving: In Jesus the Messiah God is with us, and so he is called Immanuel which means “God with us.” God was with us in our trial and pain. God is still with us. And we know that he is with us because he sent his Son to become flesh, live, die for our sin, rise from the dead, ascend to heaven, sit and reign at the Father’s right hand, and he will come again to complete and consummate his redemptive work, all in the power of the Holy Spirit. Amen and amen. Maranatha! Come, Lord Jesus!
So today I grieve with hope. I remember with hope. I cry with hope. I believe, along with the reasoning of John Piper, that infants and babies go to heaven (along with all others who are have not “suppressed the truth in unrighteousness”).
I have grieved and will continue to grieve even as I remember Rise and God’s grace. My words of grief were expressed publicly at the 12/31/23 funeral.
We have a unique song we sing to each of our kids generally before we bless them and put them to sleep. For Rise, his song is On That Day (click link to see the lyrics).